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2004.03.22 22.24
umm never make these kinds of posts
never make these kinds of posts but i hardly ever make pulbic posts either so i guess a frivelous one every now and then wont kill anything.
Slept late, Still jsut my dad in the house its kinda nice especally when hes sleep or at work casue its almost like i have the house to myself like i did the other day. Man i need to move out of here. I can afford it with a roomate or at least i should be able to when i finally get this other job. Just getting the roomate is the hard part since they have to meet the requrements my parents have inforced. And i forsee some rainie days when having my rents on them for cell phone and health and car insurance anyway. Not to make it seem like im using them but ide hate to burn bridges especally with people who mean so much to me. And i knwo that they have my best intrest at heart like they always do. Too bad teh kind of person they'de like me to move in wiht i generally cant stand. Its not an unknown fact taht i generally dislike females i hardly get along with any and if i do its in a certain capacity like they are an mild to relatively close associate or one of my "kids" and the like maybe 2 or 3 who have really made to to friend status. She'de prolly be teh religious type and as religious as a am i cant stand peopel who egnore the world becasue they have there nose in teh bible. I mean we are alive now lets ecknowledge teh world we live in. Not necessarly take whatever we can of it but at least LIVE in it. you know. She better not start condeming me for whatever i have a mother i dont need some chick trying to tell me what to do with MY life, suggestions are fine pointers and obeservations are apprciated expecally if/when i ask for it but there must be a some happy medium there. But then maybe im goign about this in teh wrong mind set. I have to have premote more positive energy to light this situation. Who knows maybe the right person will come along and we will get along swimmingly. It will happen if its is to happen at its own pace, jsut have to not try and rush it. Things pan out as they will and as they should.
Didnt do anythign i was supposed to do this weekend so i kinda stuck close to home. Hung out a bit watched a movie had great conversation. Didnt really go out well minus goth night friday, that was fun. Havent been feeling completely myself lately. Not sure whats up with that.
Anyway, missed the 1st class need to make that up. Went to casting class worked on teh wax somemore broke off all my sprues accidently but ide wrather that happen now than durring the pour. Guess i'll fix that tomorrow.
Gotta study for that Pysch test Thursday and Erica i promise to write out your notes before i go to sleep today casue i will procrastinate it into oblivian if i dont.
Got sushi today, much joiness. It was quite nice. Although i came in with a bad mood casue of that chick in line got an attitued with me in Hobby Lobby. I really could have hurt her, you know when you jsut get in one of those moods and Im thinking please jsut tap me brush against me or something so that i can let all this pent up agression, frustration, and anger out on her, stupid unsispecting peice of crap. All the while sizing her up thinking i could take her fantisizing about all teh ways to make that face more swollen and bloody thinking how much damage ide inflict if i ran her head into teh counter wondering how ecactly ide have to punch to break her nose without killing her, how many kicks i could get in before it was time to run, wondering how i would get away with this without getting arrested casue i dont need this on my record. But yeah, it ended up only being a verbal confrontation oh well... I really have a rough time trying to convence people im really not that violent when im really not i jsut get agressive thoughs every so often. So yeah, dinner was great. I love being invited out for sushi. Meet Rys friend Mike too he was quite liek the rest of us makeing this a fun but kind quite dinner, where are the talkers when you need them hehe. Oh yeah, Sorry about that Mike Im truly am not that violent you jsut happen to catch me at an intresting point.
Was late for meeting as usual but gave great insite in informaiton that i hadnt done any studying in ahead of time. I guess I am jsut so familiar with the material its like second nature to wow them with big words placed maticulously in sentences innerspurced with common knowledge to make sure i dont lose my audiance. Its almost like theater how best to say what they already know in teh most impressive way possiable wihtout completely talking over there heads. I dont know its quite interesting though. Ide advise everyone to at least visit once to each meeting. Who knows you might like/learn somehting. (forgive me for the shameless plug im compelled, its in my blood)
home now procrastinating this studying thing and the homework thing. Although i said it 2 hours ago i'll get to it...
then other stuff. blah blah blah more Chris stuff, blah blah blah more people stuff, blah blah blah mroe Him stuff, blah blah blah even more more stuff. blah blah blah emotional crap blah blah.
Thinking of becomming a vegetarian. Was advised by Adam to try eating like a vegetarian before becomming one. And to take this vitiman something or another I'll write it down when i start. Debating weither or not to include fish stuffs like my favorite food is sushi and im not seeing turning down an offer for it ever. I mean im not doing it for any other reason other than i think it might be good for me. If there were some if there were some ethical delema then ide have more conviction in it but i think fish stuffs are ok at htis point anyway. Want to start this week. In fact i'll start tomorrow. Weeks trial run. Kinda goes with my them of persuing more trancendental thoughs. Seeking enlightment through nature taking in things around you to afirm and understand your place this this world. I mean i already know i have a purpose and know what it is but that dosnet have to be the only thing i acomplish before i die.
Cant wait for invader Zim to come out on dvd. Placed a bid on a corset hope i get its really cheap on www.gothauctions.com . been looking for one for a long time and you can tell by the low bid that its not a good quality one but at least i'll have something till i get a better one. Another job would be ideal right about now. But i hear that alot. trying to see if i should hold out for teh corpert comercialized subcluture drone store or teh crappy plastic over priced prep clone store in teh mall or both. Or should i apply at Kinkos with my brothers. I mean i know that the work is gruling and working wiht people is always a joy but it would be steady and it is good hours prolly jsut 5-11am friday and 3-10 saturday. Ids still have sunday and my nights and the pays not bad. and well im jsut not sure what to do in this but i'll figure it out.
Darn didnt meet the minium bid requirement so no dice. Maybe next time.
Wow this is really a long post of not really terably important stuff. I rarely ever read anones post thats this long and wont be surpried if noone reads this one, liek i said i wouldn't. Just rambelling and procrasting long nothing rant.
there should be tea. and granola.
Mood: discontent
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